A Breathing Something

Draft-edit for the POETIC VIDEOWORK at Kunstenfestival Watou.

transcript.

[original subtitles]

angst ist eine zelle. in isolationshaft fesselt sie dich. ohne, anfassen. niet aanraken. jou aanraken. touched nothing at all. stofflich zerrissen und mit reisnadeln zusammen gestopft. het steekt. zij steekt. wenn zweiundsiebzig spitzen in deinen rücken ragen. als tweeënzeventig punten uit je rug de lucht in steken, heet dat een pantser. nennt sich das eine rüstung. eine rüstung vor wem? an armor for whom? don’t ask questions, stell keine fragen, stell dich ruhig, zet jezelf af. rüste dich vor der häutung. bewapen je tegen de vervelling. gear up. organiseer je organen vanaf de buitenkant, lass nichts durch. wees een cel. gib acht.

This planet we call home is currently experiencing the greatest extinction of species since the end of the dinosaur age 65 million years ago. This planet we call home is currently for the first year since record more than 1.5 degrees warmer than the pre-industrial average. This planet we call home has been pushed by humans over the red line. The depressive performance subject is as it were beaten down or suffocated by the self. Maturation is not compatible with today’s politics of time. The digital society of transparency de-auratizes and de-mystifies the world. Neoliberalism is anything but the endpoint of Enlightenment. It is not guided by reason. The imperative of authenticity does not lead to the formation of an autonomous, self-possesed individual; rather it is entirely co-opted by commerce. The Other is bent into shape until the ego recognizes itself in them. The narcissistic subject perceives the world only in shadows of itself.*

The future is a place we build. The future is a place we bomb.

L'avenir est un lieu que nous construisons. L'avenir est un lieu que nous bombardons.

Die Zukunft ist ein Ort, den wir bauen. Die Zukunft ist ein Ort, den wir bomben.

De toekomst is een plek die we bouwen. De toekomst is een plek die we bombarderen.

ich bitte dich darum, deine innere stimme beiseite zu legen. lass. sie. los. folge mir. beginne mit dem gewicht deiner schultern. drehe den kopf, sanft.
beobachte. zähle innerlich auf drei. eins, zwei. stupse die kugeln den rücken hinab. fühl nach. fühl leere. fühl nichts. das nichts hebt deinen kopf an. atme. tief. tiefer. du machst das gut. lenke deine aufmerksamkeit behutsam auf deine hände. ich bitte dich darum, deine hände beiseite zu legen. lass. sie. los.

de angst houdt je boomtoppen vast. sie setzt ihnen fingerhüte auf. then you cannot pierce, you’re piercing without the presence of an object. dan voel je langs je binnenwanden en je vingertoppen zijn gevoelloos. wenn it tingles, language becomes furry. when you’re growing fur, your expressions lose their echo. en waar eens iedereen jouw namen riep, kruipt er nu gejammer door de trillende kamers. fluister. flüstere. fahre mit betäubten spitzen über verschluckte münder. melt in a warm bubbly bath beneath their tongues. call someone. rufe. echo echo echo. wer das echo ruft, ist niemals allein.

[english subtitles]

fear is a cell. it shackles you in solitary confinement. without touching. no touching, you untouched. touch nothing at all. torn apart and stuffed together with rice needles. it stings. it stings. towards and further and further away from you. when seventy-two spikes stick out of your back. it's called a suit of armour. an armour for what? don't ask questions, keep quiet. protect yourself from the moulting. organise your organs from the outside, don't let anything through. be cell. take care.

This planet we call home is currently experiencing the greatest extinction of species since the end of the dinosaur age 65 million years ago. This planet we call home is currently for the first year since record more than 1.5 degrees warmer than the pre-industrial average. This planet we call home has been pushed by humans over the red line. The depressive performance subject is as it were beaten down or suffocated by the self. Maturation is not compatible with today’s politics of time. The digital society of transparency de-auratizes and de-mystifies the world. Neoliberalism is anything but the endpoint of Enlightenment. It is not guided by reason. The imperative of authenticity does not lead to the formation of an autonomous, self-possesed individual; rather it is entirely co-opted by commerce. The Other is bent into shape until the ego recognizes itself in them. The narcissistic subject perceives the world only in shadows of itself.*

The future is a place we build. The future is a place we bomb. (5x)

i ask you to put your inner voice aside. let it go. follow me. start with the weight of your shoulders. turn your head. softly. observe. silently count to three. one, two. nudge the balls down your neck. feel afterwards. feel emptiness. feel nothing. the nothing lifts your head. breathe. deeply. deeper. you are doing well. gently direct your attention to your hands. i ask you to put your hands aside. let. them. go.

fear holds your treetops. it dresses them in thimbles. then you can't prick yourself, then you can't prick any self, then you prick without an object. when it tingles, language becomes furry. when you’re growing fur, your expressions lose their echo. and where once echoes called your name, now a whimper creeps along the trembling chambers. whisper. whisper. run numb tips over swallowed mouths. melt in a warm bubbly bath beneath their tongues. call someone. call. echo echo echo. whoever calls the echo is never alone.

*Byung-Chul Han: The Expulsion of the Other: Society, Perception and Communication Today, 2018.